By Leia Giddens, IBCLC | Nurturing Lactation Care | Lactation Consultant serving Macon, Sandersville, and Middle Georgia
I want to tell you something that took me entirely too long to hear when I was a new nursing mama:
Breastfeeding is not supposed to hurt.
I know. You’ve heard the opposite. You’ve probably been told — maybe by someone well-meaning, maybe by the internet, maybe by a postpartum nurse handing you a lanolin sample on her way out the door — that soreness is just part of it. That you’ll toughen up. That it gets better.
And sometimes it does get better. But sometimes it doesn’t, and you deserve to know the difference.
First, let me say this clearly
There is a big difference between sensitivity and pain.
In the very first days, some nipple sensitivity is normal. You’ve got a brand new baby latching to a brand new experience, and your body is adjusting. That kind of tenderness usually peaks around days three to five and eases off as your body adapts and your baby gets more practiced.
What is not normal:
Toe-curling, breath-catching pain at every latch. Cracked or bleeding nipples. Nipples that look like a new lipstick, pinched flat, or come out of a feeding looking like a different shape than they went in. Pain that doesn’t ease after the first thirty seconds or so. Pain that makes you dread feeding your baby.
That’s not a rite of passage. That’s information. Your body is telling you something is off, and it is worth listening to.
So what’s actually going on?
Nine times out of ten, when a mama comes to me with this kind of pain, we are looking at a latch issue. And a latch issue — stay with me here — is almost never the mama’s fault.
Latch has a lot of factors. The baby’s anatomy plays a role. Mama’s anatomy plays a role. How the baby is positioned, how alert they are, how full or engorged the breast is at that moment, whether there’s a tongue tie restricting the baby’s range of motion — all of it matters. You didn’t cause this by doing something wrong. You just need someone to sit down with you, watch a feeding, and figure out what needs adjusting.
That is literally what I do.
Tongue tie is worth mentioning here, because it is frequently missed and even more frequently misunderstood. A restricted lingual frenulum — the little tether under the tongue — can limit how deeply a baby latches, which means they’re doing more work to transfer milk and causing a lot more friction in the process. Not every tongue tie needs to be released. Some babies compensate beautifully. But if you are in significant pain and your nipples look like they’ve been through something, it is absolutely worth having someone take a look at what’s happening in that baby’s mouth.
Nipple pain between feedings — that burning, itching, or shooting sensation that doesn’t follow the latch — is often written off as thrush and treated accordingly. I want to gently push back on that, because true thrush in healthy, full-term infants is actually quite rare, and “nipple thrush” in particular tends to be a catch-all diagnosis for pain that hasn’t been properly investigated yet. What’s often actually going on is something else entirely — and that something else matters, because the treatment is completely different.
Vasospasm, for instance, causes a burning or shooting pain after the baby comes off, sometimes with nipples turning white or bluish in response to temperature change. Eczema can cause flaking, itching, and irritated skin on the nipple and areola that looks nothing like a latch problem. Contact dermatitis — a reaction to something touching the skin — can cause redness, itching, and soreness that gets blamed on yeast simply because nobody thought to ask what’s been in contact with that skin lately. The culprit can be breast pad material, laundry detergent, or a nipple cream. Including, and I say this with full awareness of the irony, lanolin — which is probably the single most-recommended nipple ointment handed out by hospital staff and yet can absolutely cause contact dermatitis in some people. If you’ve been faithfully applying the little sample tube they sent you home with and your nipples are not getting better, it may be worth putting it down. I recommend lanolin-free nipple balms and ointments for this reason.
And then there are the silver nursing cups — you’ve probably seen them all over your social media feed, maybe had a friend swear by them. Used sparingly, they’re fine. But worn too long or too often, they trap moisture against the skin in a way that can cause maceration — essentially, the skin breaks down from being kept too wet. It’s the kind of damage that looks and feels alarming and is entirely preventable. Sweet, well-meaning people recommend these constantly. I’m not saying throw them away. I’m saying use them with some restraint, and if your nipples are getting worse instead of better, they may be why. I’m happy to talk through what I actually recommend for nipple care — because there are good options that don’t come with these risks.
If you’ve been told you have thrush and the treatment isn’t working, that is useful information. It probably means something else is going on, and it’s worth digging deeper.
The thing I want you to take from this
If nursing hurts, there is a reason. And a reason means there is a solution.
You don’t have to just push through. You don’t have to decide between your breastfeeding goals and your wellbeing. Those are not your only two options.
I’ve sat with mamas who were three days away from throwing in the towel — cracked, exhausted, convinced they were simply not built for this — and within a week of addressing the actual problem, they were nursing comfortably and wondering why nobody had helped them sooner.
That question haunts me a little, honestly. Why didn’t anyone help them sooner?
Sometimes it’s because there wasn’t a lactation consultant available. Sometimes it’s because someone told them it was normal and to wait it out. Sometimes it’s because they didn’t know that what I do even exists, or that it might be covered by their insurance.
Which is part of why I’m writing this.
Come see me in Macon — or I’ll come to you
I’m a lactation consultant serving Macon, Georgia and families throughout Middle Georgia, and I’d love to help you figure out what’s going on.
My Macon office is at 2607 Vineville Avenue, Suite 107 — right in the heart of the historic Vineville District — and with Rebecca Foley, RN, IBCLC now on the team, we have more availability than ever to see families there. You can book your Macon appointment right here. If getting out of the house with a newborn sounds like a lot (it is), I also offer home visits throughout the Macon area and across Middle Georgia, and telehealth consultations when in-person care isn’t necessary.
You can lay down on my couch, or I can sit with you on yours. Either way, I’m going to watch a full feeding, look at what’s happening with your latch, and give you a real picture of what’s going on — not just reassurance that it’ll get better.
Many insurance plans cover lactation consultation, and I can help you understand your coverage when you reach out.
You can call or text me at (478) 288-8784, visit nurturinglc.com to learn more, or to book at the Macon office directly.
Pain is not the price of admission. You deserve to enjoy this.
Leia Giddens is an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant (IBCLC) and the owner of Nurturing Lactation Care. She offers lactation consultations at her Macon, GA office on Vineville Avenue, her Sandersville office, and in clients’ homes throughout Middle Georgia. She can be reached at (478) 288-8784.